"To Husbands..." - 1 Peter 3:7

"7 You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered." - 1 Peter 3:7 NASB

     Much of what Peter commands of wives and servants applies to husbands as well.  Again, he starts off with the words "in the same way" linking back to the previous verses.  Husbands are to adopt the same selfless, Christ-centered attitude towards their wives, but it plays out differently.  Men and women were created with distinct roles and differences.  That does not mean that one is inherently more or less valuable, in fact, they are both essential to God's design.  They are complementary.  This is evidenced in Genesis; the only thing God said was "not good" was Adam being alone, and he created Eve to bring balance and harmony.  He created man and women incomplete, so that they would always recognize their need for someone else.  It was a picture of our need for God, and we more fully reflect His nature in this way; He is three persons in one God, and when man and woman come together, they are two persons with one flesh.
     So I just said that men and women are equal but different, and then the next sentence of this verse says women are "weaker."  "But Weaker isn't equal," you might say.  Well, let's look a little deeper into what Peter is actually saying.  The phrase, "as with someone weaker" is better literally translated as "as the weaker vessel."  We are often referred to as vessel's by God, and it's done for a few reasons.  The first is to show purpose.  A vessel's chief purpose is to be filled.  We are created with a purpose and find fulfilment in being used by God.  A second reason is to show that we are empty, that we have a need for something other than ourselves to be complete.
     So why is woman referred to as a weaker vessel?  Well, first off, let's clarify something.  She is not even called a weaker vessel directly in this verse... Husbands are called to treat their wives as a weaker vessel.  This is much more a statement on how the Husband's attitude should be.  I'll come back to this in a second...  To understand what Peter is getting at, let's consider something for a second.  Say you have two vessels: a plastic paint bucket, and a teacup made of fine china.  The plastic paint bucket can be filled with heavy things, can be used to haul rocks to the backyard, or filled with soapy water to wash your car.  It's very utilitarian.  If you drop it on the ground, whatever is in it might spill, but the bucket probably won't break.  You'll be able to use it again.  It can take a beating.  Now the tea cup is different.  The teacup is beautiful.  The teacup was expensive.  You bring it out at your fanciest parties and you serve delicious hot tea to your guests.  It makes them feel comfortable.  Then you carefully wash the teacup and place it in the china cabin to display its beauty even when it's not being used.  If you dropped the tea cup it would likely shatter.  The teacup and the bucket are inherently different.  No one puts a bucket on display.  When not in use, it lives in the garage somewhere.  The teacup is not utilitarian, it is treasured.  God is calling Husbands to treat their wives as treasure.  To be careful with them, to keep them safe.  Just as the teacup is washed carefully and placed in the china cabinet in a place of honor, so are Husbands to treat their wives.  Does this mean women need to be dainty and can't be tough?  No-  Because like I said before, this is about the Husband's attitude towards his wife.  He needs to cherish his wife, and treat her with respect and sensitivity.  He needs to treasure her and do whatever he can to let no harm come to her.  That is a high order.  That takes being purposeful.  I never owned china before I got married, but with my wife came some very old china she inherited from her grandmother.  She loves to make tea and sit with one of those teacups in the morning.  When I am doing dishes, I don't just hastily was that cup and toss it in with the rest of the pots and pans.  I usually was it separately and place it alone to dry, somewhere where it won't get bumped by another dish, or fall to the floor.  I treat it with a special respect because it is a more delicate object.  I am purposeful about how I treat it.
     Moving on, there is even more embedded in the language here that indicates that men and women are equal in the sight of God.  The line "show her honor as a fellow heir" is huge.  We've already talked a little about what it means to be an heir back in chapter 1, but we'll revisit quickly.  In those days, the first born son was the rightful heir to his father's estate.  To the first born son was passed the land, livestock, money, and charge of the family.  Women received nothing.  In fact, if a woman didn't marry, she stayed at home with her parents and if her parents died she could even end up on the streets.  Contrary to the culture at the time, Peter says here that christian women are co-heirs.  They are equally deserving of all the inheritance of God and that they should be treated that way.  That is very much in contrast to the way that the culture at the time viewed woman.
    So Husbands are to cherish and protect their wives and treat them as of equal value in the sight of God.  And also, failure to do so might hinder their prayers...  What's that about?  Well, the answer comes in a few of the following verses, so i'll leave that to tackle for a future blog post.